Help, I’m Following Myself

What do I do? What do I do? I am following myself. I clicked my own ‘Follow’ button to see what happened and now I can’t make it stop no matter how many times I press ‘Unfollow’. I’m frightened. I won’t be able to get a bath or a shower and I’ll have to buy a screen to get dressed behind. And I won’t be able to leave half my sandwich on the plate for later because the me who is following me will eat it. I don’t like it. I just caught myself reading over my shoulder. I need to ask Google all about stalking laws and find out if I can get an injunction out on me. What if I can’t? How will I get rid of me? Shoot behind me and hope I hit myself? I can’t, they took my guns away after I shot Simon.

Oh, goddyjesus, help me, I don’t know what to do. I wish I would go away.

3 Comments

by Dotty Headbanger on January 11, 2012 • Permalink

Posted in Dotty Potty, Faux Fake Non Fiction

Tagged blog, British, Comedy, crapcrapcrap, Depression, humor, humour, I AM MENTAL, mental health, Random, social anxiety, thoughts

Posted by Dotty Headbanger on January 11, 2012

http://dottyheadbanger.wordpress.com/2012/01/11/help-im-following-myself/

3 Comments

Persephone Jones
/ January 22, 2012

Have you played Portal – its a bit like that

Reply
pouringmyartout
/ March 19, 2012

Yesterday upon the stair…
I saw a Dotty who wasn’t there…
She wasn’t there again today…
Oh how I wish she’d go away.,..

Reply
- Dotty Headbanger
  / March 19, 2012
  
  Dear pmao,
  Oh, that’s so sweet of you. I do EVERYTHING for my hermits and followers but no one has ever written me a poem. Thank you.
  Love Dotty xxx
  
  Reply

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Help, I’m Following Myself

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Persephone Jones

pouringmyartout

Dotty Headbanger

Write a little note to Dotty. Cancel reply

Dotty’s New Blog

THE BIG BLOG COLLECTION

Search For Shite On Dotty’s Blog

It’s All Shite – Scroll Right Down The Page For The Big List Of Shite

THE CULT OF DOTTY WELCOMES YOU INTO THE FOLD. LEAVE ALL YOUR CASH IN THE BOX ON THE WALL. I NEED IT TO FEED YOU AND TO BUY THINGS FOR ME.

ALL THE SHITEY SUNDAYS

Sister Agony Auntie Dotty’s Problem Page

I LIKE THIS PICTURE

SWEAR SWEAR SWEAR AT JEMIMA

FOR AMERICANS ONLY

Cumberland Sausage Count

Dotty Headbanger’s Shitey Family – The Whole Sorry Story

A Very Nice Picture Of Kumblant

Dotty’s Doo Wop Collection

DOTTY BOOK REVIEWS

Mucky Ducky & Fucky Ducky – Poetry in motion

Press Enquiries

DOTTY’S PET BLOGS

DOTTY FILM REVIEWS

Taggywags

THE DOTTY HEADBANGER AWARD

THE BRICK & SAUSAGE AWARD

A Dotty Award

THE BEST EVER BLOGGING AWARD WITH BINS IN THE PICTURE

All The Shitey Posts I’ve Written In A Big Shitey List

DOTTY’S COLLECTED COUNTRIES

Creepy & Freaky But True

FED UP OF FACEBOOK?

Dotty’s Notes

DOTTY PAVAROTTI, THE SINGING FISH

Dotty's Good Sites

KILL ME NOW, I’M AN AWARD SLUT

ANYONE WANT TO ARGUE?

Really Shitey Shite

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Cumberland Sausages I Love You

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