I’ve been up since stupid o’clock making preparations for when little Emily arrives later this morning. I made a big batch of Cumberland sausages yesterday, I made more this morning, I’ve CLEANED SOME THINGS like the kitchen worktops and the kitchen chairs and the kitchen table and I haven’t cleaned the kitchen floor yet because Numpty the Boilerman cleaned a section of it the other day and that’ll do for now, I’ve dusted my laptop with my funny little laptop duster (mine has eyes and it’s pink and it stands up on its one big foot) and I’ve emptied the kitchen bin but I haven’t put the rubbish out because I don’t want to have a panic attack this morning, I want to be all calm and collected when she arrives.
And today, fingers crossed that anyone still wants to read my little blog, I should reach – dah dah – 10,000 hits on my little blog AND I HAVE MADE A CAKE TO CELEBRATE and it’s a VICTORIA SPONGE SANDWICH CAKE, just a normal one, no added medicinal extras because little Emily likes her cakes plain. And I have a little sticker that lovely WordPress gave me yesterday for 1,000 likey-likes and let me just see if I can make it stay where I put it (I’m rubbish with pictures)
Please stick to the page.
I’m not showing off or anything (I’m not like that), I just NEED YOU TO SEE IT so fingers crossed it does what it’s told and doesn’t shag up my page.
I wonder if I’ll get a badge for my 10,000 hits? And I wonder WHO WILL BE NUMBER 10,000?
Little Emily’s going to be SO EXCITED!
eeeekk, eeeeeekk, eeeeeeeeeeeekkkkk!
Grumpy
/ March 26, 2012Dear Dotty,
A comment doesn’t count as a post, so I can still stick to my couple of days off blogging.
Anyway, I want to be number 10,000. I might get a prize!
Grumpy x
Dotty Headbanger
/ March 26, 2012Dear Grumpy,
Nope, the count is 9,985 right now – it’s the Cumberland sausage count at the top of all the lists on the right. It doesn’t update immediately though so I’m hoping I don’t miss it because if I do I won’t know who number 10,000 is.
Love Dotty xxx
P.S. YOU’VE FAILED – YOU’RE STILL BLOGGING. COMMENTS COUNT AS BLOGGING.
judithatwood
/ March 26, 2012Dear Dotty,
Hooray! I am so very happy for you. I’m not at all surprised about the hits, though — your blog is the first I head for in the morning! Enjoy your visit with Emily; I’m sure the Cumberland sausages and the cake will both be delicious. Cumberland sausages and cake…hmmmmmm…something to think about!
I hope your day is lovely. You certainly deserve the recognition!
Love,
Judith
Dotty Headbanger
/ March 26, 2012Dear Judith,
It’s YOU!
You’re number 10,000 – when it decides to update itself!!!
HOORAY!!
I’m SO glad it’s you.
Love Dotty xxx
judithatwood
/ March 26, 2012YAAAAAHOOOOOO!!! Oh, my goodness! Isn’t that the most beautiful coincidence? Actually, I don’t believe in coincidences, and I had a feeling — #10,000 — how great for both of us! Congratulations!!!!! I love being that nice round number! And as you know, I love you and your blog!
Love,
Judith
Dotty Headbanger
/ March 26, 2012Dear Judith,
THANK YOU!
I’ll save you a piece of cake if little Emily doesn’t scoff it all. She said to tell you ‘Hello.’
Love Dotty xxx
kzackuslheureux
/ March 26, 2012Oh, I soooo want to be # 10,000. Could a get a prize? If I get a prize I’ll be back here ever 3 minutes, no, every half minute, some of those sneaky Bastards from work (namely, my teenager) might try to squeeze in there and take it from me if they know there is a prize!
You’re the best! ~Love, Alphabet
Dotty Headbanger
/ March 26, 2012Dear Alphabet,
Nope, sorry, Judith got the 10,000 and I don’t have any prizes to give out my names Dotty not Lottery. Here, have a smiley instead
Love Dotty xxx
kzackuslheureux
/ March 26, 2012Fine, I won’t check back in for another five minutes then, thank you very much!
Dotty Headbanger
/ March 26, 2012Dear alphabet,
Have another smiley
Love Dotty xxx
kzackuslheureux
/ March 26, 2012Yeah, yeah. Smile away you prize-jipping Brit!
All My Love, Alphabet
Dotty Headbanger
/ March 26, 2012Dear Alphabet,
The smileys like you. Have another
Love Dotty xxx
clownonfire
/ March 26, 2012Me! Me! Me! Me!
Me! Me! Me! Me!
The Clown
Dotty Headbanger
/ March 26, 2012Dear clown,
No! No! No! No!
No! No! No! No!
Here, have a smiley instead
Love Dotty xxx
clownonfire
/ March 26, 2012Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.
Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.
Sad Clown.
Dotty Headbanger
/ March 26, 2012Dear clown,
Have another smiley. In fact, have two.
Love Dotty xxx
clownonfire
/ March 26, 2012Dear Dotty,
Eat shit.
The Clown
.
MY NAME IS CLOWN AND I LOVE SMILEY FACES 
Dotty Headbanger
/ March 26, 2012Dear clown,
Up yours.
Love Dotty xxx
adurnablue
/ March 26, 2012Dotty I love your blog,, Plain simple truth….if i were a blog i’d date it in a heartbeat, then whisk it off to the magical land of unicorns and Cumberland sausages where’d we’d live happily ever after……. *sigh goood images
Dotty Headbanger
/ March 26, 2012Dear Adurna,
I’m sorry, I’m already bloggy-betrothed to another (Uncle!! not MY uncle, you understand, someone else’s uncle but everyone calls him Uncle and so do I). But I’ll bear you in mind if it all goes tits up.
Love Dotty xxx
robincoyle
/ March 26, 2012Love your line “stupid o’clock.”
Dotty Headbanger
/ March 26, 2012Dear robin,
It’s not mine, everyone says it here. We’re all mental.
Love Dotty xxx
tadams4u
/ March 26, 2012Yahoo!!! I’m 10,151!!!! I feel so special….
Congrats!
Dotty Headbanger
/ March 26, 2012Dear Brick,
You ARE special. You’re my BRICK and you’re talking to me through my little blog. What could be more special than that?
Love Dotty xxx
tadams4u
/ March 27, 2012ahhhh, makes me want to talk more!
Dotty Headbanger
/ March 27, 2012Dear Brick,
Talk, talk, talk. Do it.
Love Dotty xxx
Dorothy
/ March 27, 2012COngrat you lations……lol….I am SO glad it was Judith because she is very smart and a good friend to you. You are an amazing person to get so many hits but with all of the pertinent information that your blog contains why wouldn;t the world want to to read it first thing. Who needs the BBC or New York Times or The Post….pooh to them all, their information is old and stale and yours is useful for today’s rotten society.
P.S. I am not drunk just suffering from the after effects of blue pills and dementia daddy.
Dot
Dotty Headbanger
/ March 27, 2012Dear Dorothy,
I rarely watch the news, I already know what’s going to happen on it – GLOOMINESS – death, death, death, cuts, cuts, cuts, death, death, death, all relayed by smug-faced twats with stupid voices.
Love Dotty xxx
P.S. Are you feeling better yet?
cobyjean
/ March 29, 2012What? I’m to hit you 10,000 times? You’ll never stay still for that. I still have NO idea what you’re saying.
xoxoxo (Of course I do and congratulations when it happens….when you get your 1000,000 pokes to the eye….yes?)
Dotty Headbanger
/ March 29, 2012Dear gobby,
You wouldn’t be able to run fast enough to catch me.
Love Dotty xxx