Absence Note


Dear Bloggy People,

Please excuse Dotty from writing a post today. The dog ate her laptop.


Mrs Headbanger


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  1. Dear Dotty,

    I hope to see you soon, and I hope you’re okay.

    Love you,


  2. I’ve been waiting for you today! I will be here when you get the dog to poop out your laptop and then you clean it up so it can be used again.

    Feel better

  3. Dear Mrs. Headbanger,
    Will you tell Dotty I was here please. I was hoping she could help me with a good recipe, preferably something with Cumberland, since I’m having guest for dinner tonight, which happens not so often (last time was 2003) and I don’t want to fuck it up (sorry Mrs. Headbanger – Dotty will understand). Kind regards, Anette

    • P.S. Make sure somebody shoots that dog okay.

    • Dear Anette,

      Yes, I’ll tell her.

      I’ll give you one of my recipes for tonight – fry 18 Cumberland sausages in lard, butter 36 slices of bread and make Cumberland sausage sandwiches. Your guest will thank you.


      Mrs Headbanger

      • Excellent Mrs. Headbanger.
        Will Piccalilly sufficiently do as vegetables with this dish? People like veggies nowadays, I find them slightly overrated myself, but just in case my guest is a vegetarian, I think I better have some sort of vegetarian element on the table.
        Thank you.

      • Dear Anette,

        NO NO NO NO NO NO NO

        NO FUCKING VEGETABLES. If your guest is a vegetarian, tough titties – they wouldn’t serve meat to you, why should you RUIN a perfectly good Cumberland sausage sandwich with PICCALILLY? YUUUUUUUUKKKK!

        Mrs Headbanger

  4. A likely story.

  5. What the hell is Piccalilly?

  6. Dear Dotty,

    You’re such a considerate “ditcher” to post a note. ♥

    I don’t envy you the task of following that dog around to retrieve your laptop. The “Tooth Fairy” sure did not when my eldest swallowed a baby tooth.

    Enjoy your well-deserved, creatively-taken day off. *squishy hugs*

    Veggiewitch ♥

  7. It’s cool Ms. Headbanger…

  8. Dear Dotty, Disappointed! But everyone needs a day off. xoxo Mme Weebles

  9. kzackuslheureux

     /  April 5, 2012

    Dear Dotty, Yeah fine, Why don’t you take the whole weekend off why you’re at it!
    Love, Alphabet

  10. kzackuslheureux

     /  April 5, 2012

    Crap! I meant to say “While you’re at it” not why* stupid, stupid alphabet!

  11. Dear Dotty,
    I hope you enjoyed your day off :)

    the howler and me

  12. clownonfire

     /  April 6, 2012

    Dear Dotty,
    This is my second visit today.
    Just wanted to see if you were back… YAY!
    Le Clown

  13. Dear Dotty,
    20 likes and 25 comments for this post? Do you shit gold? What is your secret!? I am envious of your celebrity, espeially considering you spend so muh time in a dryer.
    In awe,

  14. Dorothy

     /  April 6, 2012

    ixnay on the otty-Day……

  15. Truant…
    You will be ruint….

  16. Hope the dog doesn’t get a virus. You may need to defrag him

  17. Dear Everybody Who I Didn’t Reply To Properly,
    I’m sorry I haven’t replied individually, I just wrote the new post and I’m bursting for a wee, but thank you. :-)
    Love Dotty xxx


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