Slimey D. Scameron is one of the most hated
Prime Ministers Britain has ever known.
This is the story of his life.
*
*
BABY SLIMEY
Slimey D. Scameron was neglected from a very early age.
Left out in the cold in all weathers, not a bonnet to keep his
tentacles warm, he knew that life would always be a
terrible struggle for him.
*
*
SCHOOLBOY SCAMERON
Waiting for his dinner in the dining hall of his boarding school,
Slimey D. Scameron dreaded the bullying taunts of his classmates.
Every single miserable day, when his dinner arrived and he started
to tuck in to the lovely grub, the name-calling began –
‘Scameron sea-pig the soup-sucker!’
Fat Scameron the sausage snaffler!
‘Gluttony hoggy food-pig!‘
and every single miserable day he left the dining hall in tears .
Poor Slimey D. Scameron.
*
*
SCAMERON THE STUDENT
Ignored and despised by scholars and professors,
Slimey D. Scameron spent his student years alone.
No wild, druggy parties for Slimey D. Scameron! No floozies!
No flights of fancy! No fun!
Just loneliness and misery and a longing for the day
when he could shoot them all.
*
*
PRIME MINISTER SCAMERON
He didn’t shoot the college up! Slimey D. Scameron found a better
way to get his own back on EVERYONE.
He became the PRIME MINISTER.
*
*
SLIMEY D. SCAMERON WITH THE QUEEN
And this is Slimey D. Scameron today,
walking companion of The Queen,
SUCCESSFUL and UNTOUCHABLE.
But at night, in bed, he still cries and cries
and sobs and sobs because with all his status
and power PEOPLE STILL CALL HIM NAMES.
Poor, poor Slimey D. Scameron.
*
*
*
the howler and me
/ June 24, 2012Dear Dotty,
Those are some wonderful pictures and what a creepy looking Prime Minister you have there…. eesh! Scares the White Baby Jesus right out of me.
Love,
-the howler and me
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 24, 2012Dear the howler and me,
Me too.
Love Dotty xxx
misfits' miscellany
/ June 24, 2012Vote for Dotty!
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 24, 2012Dear Misfit,
AYE!
Love Dotty xxx
Dorothy
/ June 24, 2012Dear Dotty,
Perhaps he should consider getting cosmetic surgery? Although I believe we are who we are, fuck the world. They are making remarkable advancements in face transplants. Maybe you could try out a few different faces on him first to see how he’d look with a new face.
Love Dorothy
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 24, 2012Dear Dorothy,
He’s just HAD plastic surgery – you should see the BEFORE pictures.
Love Dotty xxx
Daniel
/ June 24, 2012Dear Dotty. Bang goes your Knighthood! xxx
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 24, 2012Dear Daniel,
Bugger. I didn’t think of that.
Love Dotty xxx
rachelmiller1511
/ June 24, 2012Nearly fell off my chair laughing- love it! Hooray for Shitey Sundays!!
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 24, 2012Dear Rachel,
HOORAY!
Love Dotty xxx
Missus Tribble
/ June 24, 2012Dear Dotty,
At the next general election I think I’m going to draw a square with the name “Dalek Caan” next to it and I can put a cross in that one.
This will, of course, render my ballot paper defaced and void, but all other parties need to be eradicated by the Doctor because they are full of shite and are probably Slitheens in disguise.
Love, Missus Tribble xxx
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 24, 2012Dear Missus Tribble,
Hope you had a nice weekend away.
I once voted for Colin Firth’s chest.
Love Dotty xxx
Missus Tribble
/ June 24, 2012Dear Dotty,
I had a wonderful weekend thank you, and I shall blog about it tomorrow when the Spoon Fairy arrives during my sleep.
I would vote for Colin Firth’s chest any time.
Love, Missus Tribble xxx
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 24, 2012Dear Missus Tribble,
Two votes already – Colin Firth’s chest for Prime Minister!!
Love Dotty xxx
gingerfightback
/ June 24, 2012Could you do him with a side parting or on second thoughts just have him done?
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 24, 2012Dear ginger,
I’ll see what I can do. My brother, Scotty might be able to help.
Love Dotty xxx
WomanBitesDog
/ June 24, 2012That is one scary picture. It’s even scarier that they are in power…
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 24, 2012Dear wbd,
I know. Someone needs to SPLAT THEM ALL.
Love Dotty xxx
Madame Weebles
/ June 24, 2012I almost feel bad for the guy, being that slimey. I’d love to see you give the Dotty Treatment to Gordon Brown (unless you have already)!
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 24, 2012Dear Mme Weebles,
I KNOW A SONG ABOUT HIM – The Stranglers sang it!!
♬ ♪ ♬ Gordon Brown, texture like sun,
Lay me down with Madame Weebles
Throughout the night
Everything’s right
Never a frown, with Gordon Brown ♬♬ ♪
Love Dotty xxx
Madame Weebles
/ June 25, 2012Well, I used to like that song. But I will admit your rework of the lyrics is genius.
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 25, 2012Dear Mme Weebles,
I used to LOVE the song.
Love Dotty xxx
Tammy @ LaughingAtEverydayLife
/ June 24, 2012You need help…….
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 24, 2012Dear Brick,
And you’ve only just noticed this?
Love Dotty xxx
Tammy @ LaughingAtEverydayLife
/ June 24, 2012The eternal optimist in my keeps holding out faith… LOL but then again, that is why you are a proud part of our Non~Normal & Proud of It! Club
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 24, 2012Dear Brick,
Help might be at hand sooner than everyone thinks! I might do a post about it next week, or I might not – it depends how well or how shite it goes.
Love Dotty xxx
Tammy @ LaughingAtEverydayLife
/ June 24, 2012Fingers, Toes & eyes crossed for you!
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 25, 2012Dear Brick,
Thank you.
Love Dotty xxx
paralaxvu
/ June 24, 2012Poor Slimy D. Scameron…we Americans hardly knew ye…but I’ll bet ye had a lot of friends in high places on this side of the ocean, eh?
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 24, 2012Dear paralaxvu,
The only friend in high places he has is when he tries to climb as high up your President, Mr Barack Obama’s ARSE as he can get.
Love Dotty xxx
therabbitholez
/ June 24, 2012An apt description of Mr Cameron, I bet he leaves a blue sticky trail wherever he goes.
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 25, 2012Dear trh,
This made me laugh out loud. I can just imagine it.
Love Dotty xxx
LankyBrit
/ June 24, 2012Quality .. I like that a lot .. you should do one on his arch play thing ded willihand lol
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 25, 2012Dear Lanky,
HA HA HA HA HA. I might just do that.
Love Dotty xxx
magicallymad
/ June 24, 2012Dear Dotty,
Please keep your Prime Minister away from my President, if you can. Use the bricks perhaps?
Love, Magic
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 25, 2012Dear Magic,
I can’t, sorry – it would be cruel to the bricks.
Love Dotty xxx
magicallymad
/ June 25, 2012Dear Magic
Mad giggles!
Love,
Magic
Angel Fractured
/ June 25, 2012Ha, this reminds me of that Blackadder episode with William Pitt the Younger . . .
Also, where’s the Doctor when you need him? Isn’t he supposed to be saving you British lot from the monsters that are always infiltrating your country? Don’t tell me Doctor Who is a myth?! You’ll crush my ambitions of meeting him one day and going on adventures. (Though poor chance of that already, since he seems to like you Brits.)
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 25, 2012Dear Angel,
I don’t know where he’s gone. I’ll have to ask Missus Tribble, she might know.
Love Dotty xxx
kzackuslheureux
/ June 25, 2012Dear Dotty,
I don’t know if I am more jealous of your photo crapping skills our your genius.
Love, Alphabet
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 25, 2012Dear Alphabet,
Thank you. It helps to have such a handsome Prime Minister to erase bits off.
Love Dotty xxx
pouringmyartout
/ June 27, 2012I am sorry to say that I think he is absolutely adorable. I want to purchase a stuffed toy version of him so I can snuggle with it at night. Sorry he is messing up your country, but he can’t be worse than Bush and Cheney, and he is lots cuter…
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 29, 2012Dear pmao,
He is TEN THOUSAND TIMES worse than anyone, ever.
Love Dotty xxx
pouringmyartout
/ June 29, 2012I just want to kiss those slimy little tentacles…
Dotty Headbanger
/ June 29, 2012Dear pmao,
I’m telling your wife.
Love Dotty xxx
pouringmyartout
/ June 29, 2012She knows I am a tentacle man…
Jennifer Sinclair
/ July 16, 2012Fucking ‘ell Dotty – you swear too fucking much and scare me with those pics of the prime minister. ugh!
regards
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 17, 2012Dear Jennifer,
Sorry!
Love Dotty xxx
lowerarchy
/ September 5, 2012Reblogged this on DOG Sharon and commented:
Now the truth about Scameron’s early life – soon to be made into a major motion picture by Disney/Pixar
Dotty Headbanger
/ September 5, 2012Dear Dave,
Thank you.
Love Dotty xxx
lowerarchy
/ September 5, 2012My pleasure, my friend
D xx
lowerarchy
/ September 5, 2012Brilliant and scary – I wish I’d done this…
Dotty Headbanger
/ September 5, 2012Dear Dave,
No scarier than he really is.
Love Dotty xxx
lowerarchy
/ September 5, 2012Probably less so actually.
D xx
Alastair
/ October 2, 2012Hey Dotty
Haven’t had any posts from you for a while. Is everything okay?