Where’s My Fucking Badge?

 

WordPress, you’re a pile of shite. Where’s my 400 followers badge? I’m waiting for it, checking every morning, looking forward to seeing it BUT IT ISN’T THERE and now I’m up to 416 followers and it still hasn’t arrived in the little drop-down notification fuck-box at the top of the page. WHY CAN’T I HAVE IT? Why won’t you give it to me so I can do my 400 followers showing-off post? I can’t do my 400 followers showing-off post without it in case everyone thinks I’m telling fibs when I’m NOT.

Is it because you think that when a blog reaches 400 followers the blog writer doesn’t give a shite about getting a badge? Well we DO give a shite about getting a badge, just the same as when we reach 100 followers – a badge is a badge AND I WANT MINE.

You’re a set of tossers who don’t know how to do your jobs properly. How do you think BLUE PETER survived all these years? BY GIVING OUT THEIR BLUE PETER BADGE, that’s how. And what about the Queen? If a hero gets a badge for saving lives, and then he goes on to save MORE LIVES she doesn’t NOT give him a badge, does she, she gives him ANOTHER BADGE.

I’ve made my own fucking badge. Stick that up your WordPress and smoke it.

 

*

*

Leave a comment

35 Comments

  1. Dear Dotty,

    Unfortunately, due to the current “Double-Dip” Recession, we have had to make unforeseen cutbacks. We no longer issue badges until you have 1000 followers. We’re sorry for any inconvenience. However, Roz in the office has an old Blue Peter badge if that would do instead?

    Love,

    The WordPress Admin-ey People

    Reply
    • Dear WordPress Admin-ey People,

      No, it won’t do instead. I want my badge and I won’t go away until I get it.

      Love Dotty xxx

      Reply
  2. You’ll have to settle for a badger…he’s in the post. And that wasn’t easy.

    Reply
  3. awww man now i want a pretty badge! :0( damn you Dotty and your genius posts making me a badge wanting man about town, well i say town but i mean the chair at my pc.

    Reply
    • Dear Garry,

      Badges make the worldpress go round. :-)

      Love Dotty xxx

      Reply
      • actually it was kind of a hint for you to make me a pretty badge LMAO but i wouldnt know where to put it or how to do it (giggles)

      • Dear Garry,

        I’ll make you a badge. What do you want it to say? And do you want a star or something else?

        Love Dotty xxx

      • ooooo decisions decisions a star would be cool but god knows what it should say! i hadnt thought that far ahead :D

      • Dear Garry (or should I call you Moose from now on?)

        You could have one (or all) of my awards while you make your mind up. There’s the Dotty Headbanger Award For Being Mental & Loving It, or The Three Red Bins Of Blogging, or The Brick & Sausage Award For Excellence. :-)

        Love Dotty xxx

      • I answer to either especially as I have been called far worse in my time LOL

      • Dear Garry,

        I’ll call you Garry then. :-)

        Love Dotty xxx

  4. Dear Dotty,
    Wow!!!
    That’s so awesome!!
    Here’s what I’ve noticed:
    Unless the follower is a fellow WP BLOGGER …
    it’s kind of lik WP doesn’t count em.
    They do on the stats page…but no where else.
    Idk? ?
    Love,
    Lis
    Xoxo

    Reply
    • Dear Lisa,

      I’ve only got 7 separate email followers. I got a badge for 300 but it didn’t include email followers, it arrived when it had passed that mark, but it hasn’t this time. Probably because they’re pissing about with the stats pages.

      Love Dotty xxx

      Reply
  5. Dear Dotty,

    You only have 400 followers? How could anyone NOT be following you? I thought you had at least a bazillion. Huh.

    Love,
    Kathy

    Reply
  6. Dear Dotty,

    416 — Yay!!!!! I know what an accomplishment that is — good for you!

    Love,

    Judith

    Reply
    • Dear Judith,

      Thank you. It’s 418 now. :-)

      I don’t think WordPress realise that people get just as pleased and excited as when they reached 100 – it amazes me that so many people have read my shite (even if some aren’t around any more, they’ve still been here at one point). 8-)

      Love Dotty xxx

      Reply
  7. Dear Dotty,

    I would have made you one but I was in mourning for Andy. Sorry.

    xoxo Mme Weebles

    Reply
  8. Maybe they think you don’t care until you get to 500?

    Reply
    • Dear Angel,

      I bet you’re right. I was just saying to Judith in the reply to her comment, I still love it when I reach a milestone – and I still can’t quite believe it either. :-)

      Love Dotty xxx

      Reply
  9. Hahaha love it :-D

    Think your badge is better than theres ;-)

    Reply
  10. And they’ve stopped saying “Congratulations. You hit an all-time high in “likes” today.” I wonder why. Don’t they know we live for positive affirmation?

    Reply
  11. As I type this I bet you are hitting 425. :-). Congrats!

    Reply
  12. I am proud to be one of your followers… even though you have more than me… but I am not bitter… or is that biter… stupid spell checker…

    Reply

Write a little note to Dotty.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 564 other followers

%d bloggers like this: