No Post Today Because I Can’t Be Arsed. I Can’t Do A One Word Post Because I’ve Already Done One, I Can’t Do A Picture Because It Isn’t Sunday, So You’ll Have To Make Do With NOTHING
Posted in Fake Non Fiction
Tagged art, beauty, blog, blogging, British, Comedy, Depression, Dotty Headbanger, family, fiction, humor, humour, I AM MENTAL, Insanity, Life, mental, mental health, misc, News, personal, Random, satire, social anxiety
Posted by Dotty Headbanger on July 14, 2012
http://dottyheadbanger.wordpress.com/2012/07/14/no-post-today-because-i-cant-be-arsed-i-cant-do-a-one-word-post-because-ive-already-done-one-i-cant-do-a-picture-because-it-isnt-sunday-so-youll-have-to-make-do-with-nothing/
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Dotty’s New Blog
This is my new blog, Common Sense Is Dead
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It’s All Shite – Scroll Right Down The Page For The Big List Of Shite
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- Where Did Lottie Find The Fucker? Under A Bleeding Heart?
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I LIKE THIS PICTURE
It's an endearing picture of an amateur trepanner. It reminds me of me before I turned pro, though it's obviously a male and I'm obviously not a male. Do you like it too? If so, click on his X shaped eye.
SWEAR SWEAR SWEAR AT JEMIMA
If this evil doll, whose name is Jemima, came and woke me up in the night I would swear and swear like a fucking trooper. To learn how to swear like a fucking trooper, CLICK ON JEMIMA'S EVIL EYE.
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Dotty Headbanger’s Shitey Family – The Whole Sorry Story
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A Very Nice Picture Of Kumblant
This is Kumblant Zozeech, a very sad pygmy were-zompire who is fast becoming one of my best friends (little Emily, watch out). To read his journals CLICK ON HIM.
Dotty’s Doo Wop Collection
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DOTTY BOOK REVIEWS
I was going to show you a stack of books to click on for DOTTY BOOK REVIEWS but I like this shoe.
Mucky Ducky & Fucky Ducky – Poetry in motion
CLICK ON THE YELLOW ONE TO KNOCK HIM OFF THE PINK ONE. QUACK QUACK.
Press Enquiries
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All enquiries to:
dottyheadbanger AT gmail.comPaparazzi - Don't camp outside my house again or I'll set my 12 Rottweilers on you. Dotty's Rotty's will EAT YOUR FACE.
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Go and add your blog to DOTTY'S PET BLOGS and fly, my little ones, fly away to see each other, but come back to your Dotty or I'll curl up and sigh and cry and die and my pretty balloons will be thieved away by a passing guttersnipe.
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Taggywags
art beauty blog blogging bloody rubbish British Comedy crapcrapcrap Cumberland sausages Depression doobydoobydoo Dotty Headbanger emily bronte fake non fiction family fiction food funny humor humour I am a nutty nutter I AM MENTAL Insanity Life Mad Shit mental mental health misc News personal pictures pile of shite poems Poetry psychiatry psychology Random religion satire social anxiety stories thoughts why bother? words writingTHE DOTTY HEADBANGER AWARD
This new Dotty Headbanger Award picture was designed by clownonfire for posh people who want a classier looking award picture than the one I created - never mind all the time and effort I expelled doing mine. Click on it to see how to get the award.
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If I was an award, this is the award I would be.
A Dotty Award
An award for We Who Are Mental and for Normals who want to be mental. Take it and keep it for yourself or give it out like other awards - the questions that go with it will appear if you click on our great and beautiful flag.
THE BEST EVER BLOGGING AWARD WITH BINS IN THE PICTURE
I'll never make another nice award. This is it, the only one. LIMITED OFFER - grab it while you can because it won't be here for long.
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All The Shitey Posts I’ve Written In A Big Shitey List
- Dotty Weekly News
- Dotty The Fickle Fucker
- Hello, It’s Me, Dotty.
- Where Did Lottie Find The Fucker? Under A Bleeding Heart?
- Lottie Is Going Dotty And Dotty Is Having A Bouncy Week
- Shitey Sunday Picture Post – Fluffy Puffy Clouds (and a CLOUDY CAPTION COMPETITION)
- Bish Bash Bosh – I’ve Run Out Of Dosh
- Ariel Washing Machine Tablets, I Love You, You Are Beautiful
- Another New Dotty Blog
- RANT RANT RANT RANT RANT RANT RANT – And More RANT
- Another Dotty Senryu – A Mental Writer’s Mental Lament
- Shitey Sunday Picture Post – Hair!
- September, September – The Month Of Giving, And The Month Of Nine Months Of Blogging For Dotty, And It’s Nearly Christmas
- Branwell To The Rescue – Manglebrain Is Back In The Sideboard
- Dotty Is Being Beaten And Eaten By The Demon And I Don’t Know What To Do
- Shitey Sunday Picture Post – Barmy Baldies
- Manglebrain Rex, Criminatore Terribilium (The Demon In Dotty’s Attic)
- Trying To Trap The Demon In Dotty’s Attic (It Isn’t An Attic, It’s A LOFT But Attic Sounds Better)
- Why Is Life So Cruel To Me? Why? Why? What Have I Done That’s SO Wrong?
- Ghosty Spirity Spooky Spectrey FOLLOWERS
- Dotty Was Dying Of Double Pneumonia But I’m All Right Now
- Shitey Sunday Picture Post – Baby Jumping
- A Very Nice Video Post
- Hidey-Holes For Hermits
- Dotty The Sagey Wise Woman – Wise Words Of Wisdom – Part 1, A Few Idioms For Idiots
- If I Didn’t Have People Phobia I Could Have Run Outside And Kicked His Head In
- Useless Dotty Strikes Again
- Guess Who’s Coming To My House This Afternoon?
- Marvellous, Miraculous Sticky Notes
- Shitey Poem – Poemi Classicus
- Dotty The Cosmic Orderer Who Asked The Universe For £148m But Didn’t Get It
- £148m Euromillions Winners Say It Won’t Change Them
- Dotty Talking Therapy © – The Cure For Being Mental
- DOtty’s FavOurite Letter Of The Alphabet
- Shitey Sunday Picture Post – Inspirational Wordy Posters
- A Shitey Poem For Shitey Saturday – The Stolen Shoes
- Hello, My Little Chickadumplings
- Two Pints Of Laudanum And A Packet Of Crisps, Please!
- Shitey Sunday Picture Post – Weirdy Beardies And Mental Moustaches
- The Big Blog Collection – Dotty’s Choice
- It’s All In The Eyes – What NOT To Do With A Character’s Eyes If You Don’t Want Your Readers To Piss Themselves Laughing
- A Nice Letter To Dotty’s Future Dead Second Husband
- Questions, Questions, Questions – How To Successfully Torture A People Phobic She-Hermit
- ?
- Dotty’s New Novel – Part 2 – This Is Not A Love Story
- Fifty Shades Of SHITEY DROSS
- Dotty Has A Revealing Revelation
- I’m In A Bad Mood
- KUMBLANT ZOZEECH YOU SNEAKY LITTLE SHITE!!
- Yorkshire 2012 Olympickles
DOTTY’S COLLECTED COUNTRIES
Why, oh, why doesn't Smurfland like me? SMURFS, you little blue lovelies - come and visit me, please. What have I done to make you snub me like this?
Creepy & Freaky But True
Who keeps taunting me? Who is it? When I catch you I will do this to your head and your arm. I don't know what I'll do with the rest of you but be warned - I have suitcases. Lots of them.
FED UP OF FACEBOOK?
Click the green thing to sign up for Zurker and I'll get some shares.
Dotty’s Notes
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- ALL DOTTY’S COLLECTIONS IN ONE HANDY LIST
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- Sister Agony Auntie Dotty’s Problem Page
- DOTTY REVIEWS
- Dotty’s Shitey Family – The Whole Sorry Story
- DOTTY’S PET BLOGS
- DOTTY THE AWARD SLUT – AWARD COLLECTION
- VERSIONS OF MY AWARD
- BORING SHITEY POEMS
- SHITEY SHORT STORIES
- Very Sad Journal Of Very Sad Pygmy Were-Zompire
- DOTTY’S DOO-WOP COLLECTION
- ALL THE SHITEY SUNDAYS
DOTTY PAVAROTTI, THE SINGING FISH
We shall have a fishy on a little dishy, we shall have a fishy when the boat comes in. Dance to your Daddy, sing to your Mammy, dance to your Daddy when the boat comes in.
Dotty's Good Sites
- A Telly Guide I Use When I Need To Know What's On
- CIA – Ha ha ha! They Need To Learn To Spell If They Want To Be The CENTRE Of Intelligence.
- Dibble – For When They Say They're Fed Up With My Questions
- Euromillions Results So I Can Quickly Check My Ticket
- FBI – If America Needs My Help Finding Their Serial Killers I'm Only One Click Away
- MI5 – So I Can Keep An Eye On The UK Threat Level
- NASA – So I Can Keep A Watch On What They're Up To In Space
- Pondlife – The Adventures Of A Large Herd Of Single-Celled Amoebas
- RAF – They Patrol The Dangerous Skies Above My House
- Stephen Hawking Tells Me Some Of The Things I Need To Know About The Universe
- This is Asda Where I Buy My Cumberland Sausages And Other Shopping
- White, Pink, Brown Noise
KILL ME NOW, I’M AN AWARD SLUT
This award was made by Elaine at elaine4queen. I asked her if I could have it. There's no hope for me, I'll be posting pictures of cute fluffy animals next. Click on it to see more awards made by my talented acolytes.
ANYONE WANT TO ARGUE?
I just appreciate the structural engineering - what's wrong with that?
Really Shitey Shite
It’s All Old Shite
- October 2012 (3)
- September 2012 (14)
- August 2012 (27)
- July 2012 (34)
- June 2012 (36)
- May 2012 (36)
- April 2012 (38)
- March 2012 (43)
- February 2012 (47)
- January 2012 (27)
- December 2011 (6)
Dotty’s Filing Cabinet
Cumberland Sausages I Love You
EAT ME, EAT ME!
The Depressed Moose
/ July 14, 2012this nothing made me chuckle!
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 14, 2012Dear Garry,
I sometimes laugh at nothing too. Usually when I’m due a little trip to Ward 7.
Love Dotty xxx
The Depressed Moose
/ July 14, 2012is ward 7 the awesome ward?
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 14, 2012Dear Garry,
It depends what they jag into your arse.
Love Dotty xxx
The Depressed Moose
/ July 15, 2012Dear Dotty,
Check this out http://thedepressedmoose.com/2012/07/15/the-moose-seal-of-approval-award/ just to give you something to post tomorrow! Garry
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 15, 2012Dear Garry,
Thank you very much.
If it’s okay with you I’ll put it on my awards page because you’ve made it yourself and it’s funny, but I don’t do the whole question thing so I’ll bow out of answering if you don’t mind.
Love Dotty xxx
The Depressed Moose
/ July 15, 2012I know you don’t do the question thing but cant blame a guy for trying can you!
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 15, 2012Dear Garry,
Love Dotty xxx
John the Aussie
/ July 14, 2012G’day Dotty,
FINE!!!
John
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 14, 2012Dear John,
Love Dotty xxx
John the Aussie
/ July 14, 2012G’day Dotty
John
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 14, 2012Dear John,
Love Dotty xxx
Peaches
/ July 14, 2012Dear Dotty,
At least you posted a title. I think your followers would be lost without any words from you.
Love, Peaches.
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 14, 2012Dear Peaches,
I know. I might change my name to Sun Myung Dotty Moon Headbanger.
Love Dotty xxx
Peaches
/ July 14, 2012Dear Dotty,
If I were you, I would totally chose an ancient tribal religion. Then you can have fun with face paint and percussion instruments. Maybe.
Love, Peaches.
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 14, 2012Dear Peaches,
Yes!!! I’ll be the new Princess of Picts!! I’m descended from them so it’s THE perfect tribe for me. And they had some FUCKING BRILLIANT tattoos. And they were FIERCE and WARLIKE. And they played the bagpipes.
DOTTY HEADBANGER, PICTISH PRINCESS.
Thank you!
Love Dotty xxx
unfetteredbs
/ July 14, 2012you had me at ARSE..
Cheers Dotty
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 14, 2012Dear bs,
Love Dotty xxx
gingerfightback
/ July 14, 2012Great insights in today’s post Dotty.
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 14, 2012Dear ginger,
Better than usual, methinks.
Love Dotty xxx
gingerfightback
/ July 14, 2012Been a fucking busy week and just got to your hair post – it is Brilliant. You have 17 more hairs than me. I challenge you to a pubic hair count!
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 15, 2012Dear ginger,
No, I’m NOT doing THAT.
Love Dotty xxx
Missus Tribble
/ July 14, 2012Dear Dotty,
Thank you for letting us all know that Kumblant has not, in fact, eaten you.
Love, Missus Tribble xxx
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 15, 2012Dear Missus Tribble,
I’d like to see him try.
Love Dotty xxx
Victor Tookes
/ July 14, 2012Have you thought of a three word post? The possibilities are endless.
Fingernails above biscuits.
Crews leave traces.
Dotty is stingy.
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 15, 2012Dear Victor,
I’m NOT stingy, I’m just careful.
Love Dotty xxx
crazybeanrider
/ July 14, 2012Sometimes nothing is really something. Good day Dotty.-Boo
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 15, 2012Dear Boo,
I’ll remember that next time my brain empties itself.
Love Dotty xxx
crazybeanrider
/ July 15, 2012My brain deserves a good emptying pronto!
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 15, 2012Dear Boo,
Watch a lot of British ponces (Gordon Ramsay, Jeremy Kyle etc etc) on telly, that should do it.
Love Dotty xxx
crazybeanrider
/ July 16, 2012Good old reality television.
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 17, 2012Dear Boo,
Love Dotty xxx
crazybeanrider
/ July 18, 2012Craving something different I have watched a marathon of Pawn Stars this morning, and almost can say I liked it. Almost
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 18, 2012Dear Boo,
What’s Pawn Stars?
Love Dotty xxx
crazybeanrider
/ July 18, 2012It’s an American reality television show about a pawn shop. It is rather redundant to say the least, but a diversion nonetheless.
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 18, 2012Dear Boo,
I watched Big Fat Gypsy Weddings. Same type of programme watched for the same reason.
Love Dotty xxx
crazybeanrider
/ July 19, 2012I have nt seen that one, I ‘ll have to watch for it.
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 21, 2012Dear Boo,
I don’t know if they’ve shown it in the US.
Love Dotty xxx
crazybeanrider
/ July 21, 2012It’s worth a look, I kind of been watching stuff that is rather fluffy as not to drag my behind deeper into the hole I am stuck for now. My dad recommended something called the Hutterites on National Geographic, he says it is pretty dippy. I just do not want to resort to all those signing shows–>ugh!
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 21, 2012Dear Boo,
That’s the main reason I do this blog, to help drag me out of the hole. If I’m feeling really miserable I’ll stay away from the Mental Health blogs and visit only funny blogs for a while – I find the mental health ones can drag me down deeper when I’m in that state of mind. When i pick up a bit I go back to them. Have you thought of doing a humorous blog as well the one you do? It doesn’t have to be a chore, just use it as a pick-me-up.
Love Dotty xxx
crazybeanrider
/ July 21, 2012Keeping two blogs would send me bonkers. I may try to incorporate a bit more humor in the giggle house blog. Just the thought of adding another send my ADD running to the nearest closet for cover. Good suggestion though. if I can get through the next two weeks in a positive way I am hopefully going to bust up my depressive state. Having bipolar doesn’t have to be all gloom and doom, and I know that. So if i can I will post some of my not so serious antics, because I do have them. Thank you for the positive suggestions, you are awesome Dotty!
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 22, 2012Dear Boo,
Well it is called the Giggle House.
Love Dotty xxx
crazybeanrider
/ July 22, 2012LOL! Yes it is after all, what’s a giggle house without laughs?-Boo
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 22, 2012Dear Boo,
Exactly
Love Dotty xxx
judithatwood
/ July 14, 2012Dear Dotty,
Enjoy your day off!
Love,
Judith
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 15, 2012Dear Judith,
I did! And guess what? I CLEANED SOME OF THE HOUSE!! Miracles will never cease.
Love Dotty xxx
Kathy V.
/ July 14, 2012How is it that you can write a non-post and we still read it? I need some of your blogging mojo.
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 15, 2012Dear Kathy,
I don’t know. It’s weird.
Love Dotty xxx
Phil
/ July 14, 2012Brevity is the soul of wit.
~Polonius~
Long-windedly yours,
Phil
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 15, 2012Dear Phil,
Yes.
Love Dotty xxx
Tammy @ LaughingAtEverydayLife
/ July 15, 2012Leave it to you to get 25 likes and 17 comments on nothing.
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 15, 2012Dear Brick,
Mental, isn’t it?
Love Dotty xxx
Tammy @ LaughingAtEverydayLife
/ July 15, 2012You are the queen and I bow….Elizabeth has nothing on you!
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 16, 2012Dear Brick,
Love Dotty xxx
paralaxvu
/ July 15, 2012Nothing from the Pict Princess? Nothing from you is better than two birds in a bush. Or anything else. Really.
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 15, 2012Dear paralaxvu,
I cleaned some of my house yesterday. I gave my living room and the hallway, stairs and landing a good gutting out and now I can’t stop looking at the CLEANNESS of it.
Love Dotty xxx
Angel Fractured
/ July 15, 2012That sure is a whole lot of nothing!
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 15, 2012Dear Angel,
It is, isn’t it?
Love Dotty xxx
pouringmyartout
/ July 16, 2012We have been asked to make do with less than that…
Dotty Headbanger
/ July 17, 2012Dear pmao,
Yes, well…
Love Dotty xxx
pouringmyartout
/ July 17, 2012Exactly!