Lottie had a copy of this SHITE in her bag. I nicked it when she went to the loo, not to READ it (you can all shoot me if I ever get THAT desperate), I wanted to take the piss out of it. But I can’t take the piss out of it, it’s too SHITEY. It’s TOO BAD TO MOCK. The horrendous writing makes me SHRIVEL IN DISMAY.
This is the first sentence —
“I scowl with frustration at myself in the mirror.”
This is the last sentence —
“I curl up, desperately clutching the flat foil balloon and Taylor’s handkerchief, and surrender myself to my grief.”
This is the first paragraph I saw when I opened the book randomly —
“”I want to bite this lip,” he murmurs against my mouth, and carefully he tugs at it with his teeth. I moan, he smiles.”
How does he smile with her lip in his teeth? And how does she see him smile? Is she bog-eyed?
Oh go on then, heres another random sentence —
“I wake early to a gray Sunday morning after a surprisingly refreshing night’s sleep and lie awake staring at my crates.”
I’ve never heard them called that before.
That’s it, I’ve had enough.