Dear Bloggy People,
My name is Dotty Headbanger. Things are wrong with me (I’M MENTAL AND MY LITTLE FINGER IS BENT) and the state of this blog is proof of it in case you don’t believe me. It’s a tip, like my desk – which is not an office desk in an office, it’s a kitchen table with three corners, (the fourth was knocked off during a fist-fight with my fridge). My desk is in the spare room but I can’t go in there any more. There are reasons why but I’m not telling you what they are.
Some of what I write will be true, some of it won’t but don’t bother asking ME because I don’t know up from down, left from right, arse from tit. If you’re really nosey and want to find the truth it’s probably hiding somewhere between the lines with the flock of crows that live there.
Lots of love,
P.S. All things on this blog are written by me and are copyrighted to ME. Please don’t take or share my stuff without permission. If you steal anything I’ll set my starving pack of velociraptors on you.
P.P.S. I have an email address. It’s dottyheadbanger AT gmail.com. You can use it if you want to send me money or if you’ve fallen deeply in love with me and don’t want other bloggy people to know.
P.P.P.S. I have a Facebook too, but don’t tell anyone, it’s a secret.