Shitey Sunday Picture Post – Hair!

 

I’ve had enough of men and their hair (or lack of it). This week it’s the turn of the ladies and I’ve chosen some nice, easy styles for the busy, modern woman.

*

DOG HAIR

To bring out your inner bitch

*

*

DEER HAIR or GIRAFFE HAIR

At first it looked like a deer, now I think it’s a giraffe.

*

*

BEAR HAIR

This is a bear made of hair

*

*

ANOTHER BEAR HAIR

This is another bear made of hair

*

*

BUNNY RABBIT HAIR

Bright eyes, burning like fire

*

*

STAG HAIR

The Monarch of the Glen – on your head.

*

*

HORSE HAIR

I know, I know – this is a man. A ginger man. But look at his horse!!

*

*

BIRD’S NEST HAIR

WITH A MINI BEAR CLIMBING UP THE HAIR

Look at me, I’m like a tree!

A sweaty tree.

*

*

GUITAR HAIR

Is it a guitar? It’s too big for a violin, too small for a double bass.

Yes, it’s a guitar. Strum that thing, hairdresser.

*

*

HELICTOPER HAIR

What’s that thing on her nose?

*

*

ANOTHER HELICOPTER HAIR

I love helicopter hair.

*

*

AMERICAN HAIR

And finally, a little present for my Collected Americans –

The Statue of Liberty

*

*

Shitey Sunday Picture Post – Weirdy Beardies And Mental Moustaches

 

Did you know there’s such a thing as FACIAL HAIR ART? Nope, neither did I until I saw

CHRIS’S MOUSTACHE POST  (go and look at it)

and thought ‘AHA! I bet there’s some FUCKING STUPID moustaches out there and I bet if I find some I can steal Chris’s idea for a moustache post and turn it into my Shitey Sunday Picture Post because originally I was going to do something about the Olympickles again but I couldn’t be bothered because I’M BORED OUT OF MY TINY SKULL WITH THE OLYMPICKLES.’

So I did a search. And A WHOLE NEW WORLD WAS OPENED UP TO ME. A world of WEIRDY BEARDIES and MENTAL MOUSTACHES, and even though I feel just a TEENSY bit guilty about nicking Chris’s idea, I don’t feel guilty enough NOT TO USE IT.

Brace yourself, bloggy people. Prepare to be ASTONISHED. I’m not going to make any sarcastic quips today because I don’t NEED to – THE PICTURES SPEAK FOR THEMSELVES.

 

*

THE APPRENTICE

*

*

THE EXPERT

*

*

THE LEMON HOLDER

*

*

THE BEER HOLDER

*

*

THE CLOCK

*

*

THE WINDMILL

*

*

THE BRIDGE

*

*

THE SEA CREATURE

*

*

THE COLLECTION

*

*

THE BIG GINGER BEARD OF SHAME

*

*

Dismal Dotty

 

Sorry I didn’t do a post yesterday, I was counting my hair.

147245 – twenty three fewer hairs than last month.

I’m going bald.

And I’m scared of WIGS.

I have a WIG PHOBIA.

WIGS freak me out completely.

I don’t want to wear a WIG.

I don’t want to.

 

Shitey Sunday Picture Post – Llamas And Their Hairstyles

 

This Shitey Sunday Picture Post is all about LLAMAS AND THEIR HAIRSTYLES. Llama hair is a big money-raking part of the animal beauty industry along with pig plastic surgery (liposuction, tummy tucks, nose jobs), nail care for birds of prey (French polishing is very popular at the moment), and skincare for elephants and other dry animals, (Note: Non of the products are tested on humans. They swear they’re not).

 

 

THE OXFORD FLOP

for the young, educated llama who knows about

lonely clouds and daffodils.

*

*

THE POM-POM

for that special occasion

*

*

THE BUFFALO

I AM a buffalo. I AM.

*

*

THE CATWALK

London. Paris. Milan. New York.

(Please can I have a biscuit? Please? Just one?)

*

*

THE DISCO BOFF

Yes sir, I can boogey

all night looooooong.

*

*

THE SID VICIOUS

It’s a nice day for a WHITE WEDDING

*

*

THE GAWKY GEEK

It’s not fair. I try to fit in, but they don’t want me.

*

*

THE SUPREME

Because I’m worth it.

*

*

SHORT BACK AND SIDES

Hello. My name’s Andrew and I like cricket.

*

*

THE TOUSLED DONKEY

eeee-aww, eeee-aww, eeee-aww

*

*

%d bloggers like this: