£148m Euromillions Winners Say It Won’t Change Them

 

The couple who won the Euromillions jackpot on Friday were just on the BBC News.

He doesn’t want to give up the music shop he owns.

They MIGHT buy a new house. At the end of the report, the reporter said “they said they won’t let it change them.” Meaning their win.

WHY THE FUCK DID THEY BUY A TICKET IN THE FIRST PLACE THEN?

If you don’t want your life to change DON’T BUY A TICKET. Leave the tickets for those of us who DO want our lives to change.

Am I jealous? YES I FUCKING WELL AM JEALOUS. 

That was MY jackpot.

MY £148M.

Would I have let it change me?

FUCK, YES.

It’s not fair.

 

 

The Universe Is Bestowing Blessings On ME, Dotty!!!!!

 

What’s happening? What’s all this GOOD LUCK I’m having? Is it a result of me SAVING THE WORLD yesterday? Have the BUTTERFLIES grown extra pairs of WINGS? Is it an anomaly in the UNIVERSE? Has a NEW BLACK HOLE opened up in a distant GALAXY and is, at this very moment, sucking up all the BAD?

FANFARE. DRUM ROLL.

DAH-DAH

I HAVE WON THE EUROMILLIONS.

Me, Dotty, the Dotty who never wins anything even a booby prize. I just checked my ticket from Friday night and BOSH, I’m a winner! Granted, it’s only £2.80 but that’s A PACKET OF CUMBERLAND SAUSAGES (£1.50) and almost ANOTHER PACKET OF CUMBERLAND SAUSAGES!!!!

Waaahooooo!! Get in there, Dotty, you lucky cow!

 

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