Shitey Sunday Picture Post – Barmy Baldies

 

We’ve seen the Weirdy Beardies, now it’s the turn of the Barmy Baldies.

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This is artist PHILIP LEVINE who, when he started going bald,

decided to use his head as a canvas.

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Philip again (click on the pics to go to his website for more)

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Having a picture on your bald head is all well and good

when you can wash it off. But what about permanent pictures

like this…

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or this…

 

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or this…

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 or this…

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or this (which combines Barmy Baldy, Weirdy Beardy & GINGER)…

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or this…

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or this (MY FAVOURITE)…

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but if you’re too chicken for a tattoo and you’re no good at art,

but you REALLY REALLY REALLY want a nice decorative feature

for your big baldy head, you can’t beat a BIG TURKEY.

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Shitey Sunday Picture Post – Baby Jumping

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Castrillo de Murcia in Spain.

It’s a nice sunny day.

What shall we do?

I know, we’ll take our babies out for the day and lie them on mattresses in the street.

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This nice Catholic tradition of lying our babies

on mattresses in the street goes back to 1620.

It’s called El Colacho.

It’s holy. The priests are here. They love it too.

But what’s this?

OH NO!

Here comes The Devil!!

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Phew, he isn’t going to smite us!

He just wants to jump over our babies

to cleanse them of original sin.

That’s all right then.

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BOING

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BOING

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BOING

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BOING

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BOING

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BOING BOING BOING BOING BOING

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That was a lovely day out.

Now we’ll go home for tea.

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Shitey Sunday Picture Post – Slimey D. Scameron, The Sea Pig Prime Minister

Slimey D. Scameron is one of the most hated

Prime Ministers Britain has ever known.

This is the story of his life.

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BABY SLIMEY

Slimey D. Scameron was neglected from a very early age.

Left out in the cold in all weathers, not a bonnet to  keep his

tentacles warm, he knew that life would always be a

terrible struggle for him.

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SCHOOLBOY SCAMERON

Waiting for his dinner in the dining hall of his boarding school,

Slimey D. Scameron dreaded the bullying taunts of his classmates.

Every single miserable day, when his dinner arrived and he started

to tuck in to the lovely grub, the name-calling began —

‘Scameron sea-pig the soup-sucker!’

Fat Scameron the sausage snaffler!

‘Gluttony hoggy food-pig!

and every single miserable day he left the dining hall in tears .

Poor Slimey D. Scameron.

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SCAMERON THE STUDENT

Ignored and despised by scholars and professors,

Slimey D. Scameron spent his student years alone.

No wild, druggy parties for Slimey D. Scameron! No floozies!

No flights of fancy! No fun!

Just loneliness and misery and a longing for the day

when he could shoot them all.

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PRIME MINISTER SCAMERON

He didn’t shoot the college up! Slimey D. Scameron found a better

way to get his own back on EVERYONE.

He became the PRIME MINISTER.

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SLIMEY D. SCAMERON WITH THE QUEEN

 And this is Slimey D. Scameron today,

walking companion of The Queen,

SUCCESSFUL and UNTOUCHABLE.

But at night, in bed, he still cries and cries

and sobs and sobs because with all his status

and power PEOPLE STILL CALL HIM NAMES.

Poor, poor Slimey D. Scameron.

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