Slimey D. Scameron is one of the most hated
Prime Ministers Britain has ever known.
This is the story of his life.
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BABY SLIMEY

Slimey D. Scameron was neglected from a very early age.
Left out in the cold in all weathers, not a bonnet to keep his
tentacles warm, he knew that life would always be a
terrible struggle for him.
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SCHOOLBOY SCAMERON

Waiting for his dinner in the dining hall of his boarding school,
Slimey D. Scameron dreaded the bullying taunts of his classmates.
Every single miserable day, when his dinner arrived and he started
to tuck in to the lovely grub, the name-calling began —
‘Scameron sea-pig the soup-sucker!’
Fat Scameron the sausage snaffler!
‘Gluttony hoggy food-pig!‘
and every single miserable day he left the dining hall in tears .
Poor Slimey D. Scameron.
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SCAMERON THE STUDENT

Ignored and despised by scholars and professors,
Slimey D. Scameron spent his student years alone.
No wild, druggy parties for Slimey D. Scameron! No floozies!
No flights of fancy! No fun!
Just loneliness and misery and a longing for the day
when he could shoot them all.
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PRIME MINISTER SCAMERON

He didn’t shoot the college up! Slimey D. Scameron found a better
way to get his own back on EVERYONE.
He became the PRIME MINISTER.
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SLIMEY D. SCAMERON WITH THE QUEEN

And this is Slimey D. Scameron today,
walking companion of The Queen,
SUCCESSFUL and UNTOUCHABLE.
But at night, in bed, he still cries and cries
and sobs and sobs because with all his status
and power PEOPLE STILL CALL HIM NAMES.
Poor, poor Slimey D. Scameron.
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