*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
CLOUDY CAPTION COMPETITION
(which disappeared the first time I posted it)
Put a caption on the cloud men picture to win nothing but the pleasure
of knowing you’re the best CLOUDY CAPTION WINNER ever.
*
*
All posts tagged pictures
Shitey Sunday Picture Post – Fluffy Puffy Clouds (and a CLOUDY CAPTION COMPETITION)
Posted by Dotty Headbanger on September 16, 2012
https://dottyheadbanger.wordpress.com/2012/09/16/shitey-sunday-picture-post-fluffy-puffy-clouds-and-a-cloudy-caption-competition/
Shitey Sunday Picture Post – Barmy Baldies
We’ve seen the Weirdy Beardies, now it’s the turn of the Barmy Baldies.
*
This is artist PHILIP LEVINE who, when he started going bald,
decided to use his head as a canvas.
*
*
*
*
Philip again (click on the pics to go to his website for more)
*
*
Having a picture on your bald head is all well and good
when you can wash it off. But what about permanent pictures
like this…
*
*
or this…
*
*
or this…
*
*
or this…
*
*
or this (which combines Barmy Baldy, Weirdy Beardy & GINGER)…
*
*
or this…
*
*
or this (MY FAVOURITE)…
*
*
but if you’re too chicken for a tattoo and you’re no good at art,
but you REALLY REALLY REALLY want a nice decorative feature
for your big baldy head, you can’t beat a BIG TURKEY.
*
*
Posted by Dotty Headbanger on September 2, 2012
https://dottyheadbanger.wordpress.com/2012/09/02/shitey-sunday-picture-post-barmy-baldies/
Shitey Sunday Picture Post – Baby Jumping
*
Castrillo de Murcia in Spain.
It’s a nice sunny day.
What shall we do?
I know, we’ll take our babies out for the day and lie them on mattresses in the street.
*
*
This nice Catholic tradition of lying our babies
on mattresses in the street goes back to 1620.
It’s called El Colacho.
It’s holy. The priests are here. They love it too.
But what’s this?
OH NO!
Here comes The Devil!!
*
*
Phew, he isn’t going to smite us!
He just wants to jump over our babies
to cleanse them of original sin.
That’s all right then.
*
*
BOING
*
*
BOING
*
*
BOING
*
*
BOING
*
*
BOING
*
*
BOING BOING BOING BOING BOING
*
*
That was a lovely day out.
Now we’ll go home for tea.
*
Posted by Dotty Headbanger on August 26, 2012
https://dottyheadbanger.wordpress.com/2012/08/26/shitey-sunday-picture-post-baby-jumping/
Shitey Sunday Picture Post – Weirdy Beardies And Mental Moustaches
Did you know there’s such a thing as FACIAL HAIR ART? Nope, neither did I until I saw
CHRIS’S MOUSTACHE POST (go and look at it)
and thought ‘AHA! I bet there’s some FUCKING STUPID moustaches out there and I bet if I find some I can steal Chris’s idea for a moustache post and turn it into my Shitey Sunday Picture Post because originally I was going to do something about the Olympickles again but I couldn’t be bothered because I’M BORED OUT OF MY TINY SKULL WITH THE OLYMPICKLES.’
So I did a search. And A WHOLE NEW WORLD WAS OPENED UP TO ME. A world of WEIRDY BEARDIES and MENTAL MOUSTACHES, and even though I feel just a TEENSY bit guilty about nicking Chris’s idea, I don’t feel guilty enough NOT TO USE IT.
Brace yourself, bloggy people. Prepare to be ASTONISHED. I’m not going to make any sarcastic quips today because I don’t NEED to – THE PICTURES SPEAK FOR THEMSELVES.
*
THE APPRENTICE
*
*
THE EXPERT
*
*
THE LEMON HOLDER
*
*
THE BEER HOLDER
*
*
THE CLOCK
*
*
THE WINDMILL
*
*
THE BRIDGE
*
*
THE SEA CREATURE
*
*
THE COLLECTION
*
*
THE BIG GINGER BEARD OF SHAME
*
*
Posted by Dotty Headbanger on August 5, 2012
https://dottyheadbanger.wordpress.com/2012/08/05/shitey-sunday-picture-post-weirdy-beardies-and-mental-moustaches/
Yorkshire 2012 Olympickles
I thought I’d make a nice picture for tonight’s
OPENING CEREMONY of the OLYMPICKLES.
I’ll be ignoring the rest of it.
*
*
*
*
Posted by Dotty Headbanger on July 27, 2012
https://dottyheadbanger.wordpress.com/2012/07/27/yorkshire-2012-olympickles/
Shitey Sunday Picture Post
Just one picture today. Yes I know it’s a piss poor Shitey Sunday Picture Post but it’s all you’re getting this week – and it made ME laugh. But I’m going to do a video post later so that’s a bonus. And I might even do a writing post if a miracle happens. You’ll be so sick of me by the end of today you’ll wish I’d never come back. (EVIL LAUGH GOES HERE BUT I’M NOT WRITING IT BECAUSE IT LOOKS STUPID AND I CAN’T REMEMBER HOW TO SPELL IT ANYWAY – MWWUUHAHA?? MUWHAHA? MOOOOHAAHAA?)
*
*
Posted by Dotty Headbanger on July 22, 2012
https://dottyheadbanger.wordpress.com/2012/07/22/shitey-sunday-picture-post/
Shitey Sunday Picture Post – Andy Again
After last night’s BRILLIANT match, here’s Andy Murray again. Just one picture this time, and a link to the
Shitey Sunday Picture Post he starred in a few weeks ago when I got him ready for Wimbledon.
Here’s the link — ANDY MURRAY —-
and here’s the picture —
*
*
*
Posted by Dotty Headbanger on July 1, 2012
https://dottyheadbanger.wordpress.com/2012/07/01/shitey-sunday-picture-post-andy-again/
Shitey Sunday Picture Post – Slimey D. Scameron, The Sea Pig Prime Minister
Slimey D. Scameron is one of the most hated
Prime Ministers Britain has ever known.
This is the story of his life.
*
*
BABY SLIMEY
Slimey D. Scameron was neglected from a very early age.
Left out in the cold in all weathers, not a bonnet to keep his
tentacles warm, he knew that life would always be a
terrible struggle for him.
*
*
SCHOOLBOY SCAMERON
Waiting for his dinner in the dining hall of his boarding school,
Slimey D. Scameron dreaded the bullying taunts of his classmates.
Every single miserable day, when his dinner arrived and he started
to tuck in to the lovely grub, the name-calling began —
‘Scameron sea-pig the soup-sucker!’
Fat Scameron the sausage snaffler!
‘Gluttony hoggy food-pig!‘
and every single miserable day he left the dining hall in tears .
Poor Slimey D. Scameron.
*
*
SCAMERON THE STUDENT
Ignored and despised by scholars and professors,
Slimey D. Scameron spent his student years alone.
No wild, druggy parties for Slimey D. Scameron! No floozies!
No flights of fancy! No fun!
Just loneliness and misery and a longing for the day
when he could shoot them all.
*
*
PRIME MINISTER SCAMERON
He didn’t shoot the college up! Slimey D. Scameron found a better
way to get his own back on EVERYONE.
He became the PRIME MINISTER.
*
*
SLIMEY D. SCAMERON WITH THE QUEEN
And this is Slimey D. Scameron today,
walking companion of The Queen,
SUCCESSFUL and UNTOUCHABLE.
But at night, in bed, he still cries and cries
and sobs and sobs because with all his status
and power PEOPLE STILL CALL HIM NAMES.
Poor, poor Slimey D. Scameron.
*
*
*
Posted by Dotty Headbanger on June 24, 2012
https://dottyheadbanger.wordpress.com/2012/06/24/shitey-sunday-picture-post-slimey-d-scameron-the-sea-pig-prime-minister/
Shitey Sunday Picture Post – A Photoshop Thing
I’ve been pissing around with Photoshop, trying to get to know it and I’ve made this picture. It’s bigger than this – click it if you want and it’ll take you to the big one.
*
*
Posted by Dotty Headbanger on June 17, 2012
https://dottyheadbanger.wordpress.com/2012/06/17/shitey-sunday-picture-post-a-photoshop-thing/
Shitey Sunday Picture Post – Opheliama (An Idyll)
Don’t worry, Kumblant didn’t drown.
And after I told him the baby llamas weren’t to be used to make a sandwich
for his Cumberland sausage, he was fine about them being there and he left
them alone until the photo had been taken.
*
*
Posted by Dotty Headbanger on June 10, 2012
https://dottyheadbanger.wordpress.com/2012/06/10/shitey-sunday-picture-post-opheliama-an-idyll/
Venus Has A Little Trot Across The Sun
This is your last chance to see Venus dawdling across the Sun. We’ll all be dead the next time she comes by.
*
*
*
Posted by Dotty Headbanger on June 5, 2012
https://dottyheadbanger.wordpress.com/2012/06/05/venus-has-a-little-trot-across-the-sun/
Jubilee, Jubilee, Jubilee
For the Jubilee I’ve made a Photoshop picture, the second one I’ve ever made, and the first one I’ve done without any help. It’s crap but I like it and Kumblant loves it – he got to wear the diamonds. And he was allowed to eat the corgis when we’d finished.
*
Posted by Dotty Headbanger on June 4, 2012
https://dottyheadbanger.wordpress.com/2012/06/04/jubilee-jubilee-jubilee/
Shitey Sunday Picture Post – Llamas And Their Hairstyles
This Shitey Sunday Picture Post is all about LLAMAS AND THEIR HAIRSTYLES. Llama hair is a big money-raking part of the animal beauty industry along with pig plastic surgery (liposuction, tummy tucks, nose jobs), nail care for birds of prey (French polishing is very popular at the moment), and skincare for elephants and other dry animals, (Note: Non of the products are tested on humans. They swear they’re not).
THE OXFORD FLOP
for the young, educated llama who knows about
lonely clouds and daffodils.
*
*
THE POM-POM
for that special occasion
*
*
THE BUFFALO
I AM a buffalo. I AM.
*
*
THE CATWALK
London. Paris. Milan. New York.
(Please can I have a biscuit? Please? Just one?)
*
*
THE DISCO BOFF
Yes sir, I can boogey
all night looooooong.
*
*
THE SID VICIOUS
It’s a nice day for a WHITE WEDDING
*
*
THE GAWKY GEEK
It’s not fair. I try to fit in, but they don’t want me.
*
*
THE SUPREME
Because I’m worth it.
*
*
SHORT BACK AND SIDES
Hello. My name’s Andrew and I like cricket.
*
*
THE TOUSLED DONKEY
eeee-aww, eeee-aww, eeee-aww
*
*
Posted by Dotty Headbanger on June 3, 2012
https://dottyheadbanger.wordpress.com/2012/06/03/shitey-sunday-picture-post-llamas-and-their-hairstyles/
Shitey Sunday Sausage Picture Post
Cumberland Sausages. Did you know I love them?
I can spell my favourite words with them.
I can watch them live free in the wild fields of Cumberland.
and seeing as it’s Sunday, I can appreciate their spiritual beliefs.
I love my Cumberland sausages. I want them to be perfect
so I applied for this job and got it –
Hip hip hooray
A Cumberland sausage a day
Will keep the mentals away
Oh happy happy day
Posted by Dotty Headbanger on May 27, 2012
https://dottyheadbanger.wordpress.com/2012/05/27/shitey-sunday-sausage-picture-post/
Shitey Sunday Picture Post – Andy Murray
I can’t wait for Wimbledon to start. I don’t watch any sports on telly, they’re all shite, but I like tennis when Andy Murray plays. And when Rafael Nadal plays. I like Andy because he’s OURS and I like Rafa because he’s FIT. Well, Andy can be a BIT FIT sometimes and I think when he gets his jaw problem sorted out he’ll be MORE FIT. I’m going to try and help him —
Look at his nice teeth.
Here’s a side view of his nice teeth.
We can’t see your full set of nice teeth, Andy!
It’s becoming painful, isn’t it? I’m going to help you close your mouth now —
BOP!
Oops! Was that too hard? Sorry!
Oh well, you’ve got to be cruel to be kind. I might not have made him any FITTER but at least his jaws will be ready for Wimbledon.
Posted by Dotty Headbanger on May 20, 2012
https://dottyheadbanger.wordpress.com/2012/05/20/shitey-sunday-picture-post-andy-murray/
The Shitey Sunday Dotty Picture Post – # 1
La la la la la. Bored, bored, bored. Nothing to write, AGAIN.
What is it about Sundays that makes them so shitey?
Here’s a picture of a pigowl.
He’s lovely, isn’t he?
I don’t like his glasses though.
He should have gone to SpecSaver.
TWIT TWOOOOOOOIINNK
TWIT TWOOOOOOOIINNK
Posted by Dotty Headbanger on May 13, 2012
https://dottyheadbanger.wordpress.com/2012/05/13/the-shitey-sunday-dotty-picture-post-1/
The Three Red Bins Of Blogging Award (The Best Award I’ve Made Today)
I’ve been bored out of my skull today waiting for the universe to die so I’ve made a new award AND IT’S A NICE AWARD because I thought I’d better be nice for a change in case there IS a god.
This is my new award
See how nice I’ve been? I think I’ve been EXCEPTIONALLY NICE, nice enough to get me into HEAVEN if there IS a god.
There are two requirements to having this award –
1 — You have to CLICK ON THIS LINK AND THEN PRESS LIKE
2 — You have to CLICK ON THIS LINK AND ADD YOUR BLOG
If you’ve already done these two things you are BRILLIANT and I award you my new award which is a very, very classy award, if I do say so myself. If you haven’t already done these two things GO AND DO THEM.
When (notice I’m not saying ‘if’) you put it on your own site, you can set your own conditions to manipulate your readers into doing what you want them to do.
Go forth, my acolytes, and continue being brilliant.
Posted by Dotty Headbanger on April 28, 2012
https://dottyheadbanger.wordpress.com/2012/04/28/the-three-bins-of-blogging-award-the-best-award-ive-made-today/
A Dotty Picture Puzzle
What’s the answer to the picture puzzle?
Robert de Niro's waiting
It’s easy.
talking Italian...
First one to get it right can have the pictures if they want.
I’m only doing a picture puzzle to practice doing pictures and making them stick where I put them.
Fingers crossed!
Posted by Dotty Headbanger on March 27, 2012
https://dottyheadbanger.wordpress.com/2012/03/27/a-dotty-picture-puzzle/
THE BIG BLOG COLLECTION
GO AND ADD YOUR BLOG TO THE LISTS. AND DON'T FORGET TO PRESS FOLLOW.
Dotty’s New Blog
This is my new blog, Common Sense Is Dead
ALL THE SHITEY SUNDAYS
Shitey Sunday Picture Posts - Click on the big doomy cross to get to the list
Sister Agony Auntie Dotty’s Problem Page
Go here if you need advice. Click on her big red cross.
I LIKE THIS PICTURE
It's an endearing picture of an amateur trepanner. It reminds me of me before I turned pro, though it's obviously a male and I'm obviously not a male. Do you like it too? If so, click on his X shaped eye.
SWEAR SWEAR SWEAR AT JEMIMA
If this evil doll, whose name is Jemima, came and woke me up in the night I would swear and swear like a fucking trooper. To learn how to swear like a fucking trooper, CLICK ON JEMIMA'S EVIL EYE.
FOR AMERICANS ONLY
Are you American? Do you need a new job? Do you want to move to Britain? PUSH THE SPARKLY BUTTON to begin this new and wonderful chapter of your life. NOW INCLUDES CANADIANS.
Dotty Headbanger’s Shitey Family – The Whole Sorry Story
The ongoing story of me and my family. Click here if you want to know who's who and what's what.
A Very Nice Picture Of Kumblant
This is Kumblant Zozeech, a very sad pygmy were-zompire who is fast becoming one of my best friends (little Emily, watch out). To read his journals CLICK ON HIM.
Dotty’s Doo Wop Collection
This is a picture of one of the cd cases in my doo wop cd collection. I didn't take the picture. Either click on it to read the bit of shite in there or look at the drop-down list for the songs.
DOTTY BOOK REVIEWS
I was going to show you a stack of books to click on for DOTTY BOOK REVIEWS but I like this shoe.
Mucky Ducky & Fucky Ducky – Poetry in motion
CLICK ON THE YELLOW ONE TO KNOCK HIM OFF THE PINK ONE. QUACK QUACK.
DOTTY’S PET BLOGS
Go and add your blog to DOTTY'S PET BLOGS and fly, my little ones, fly away to see each other, but come back to your Dotty or I'll curl up and sigh and cry and die and my pretty balloons will be thieved away by a passing guttersnipe.
DOTTY FILM REVIEWS
Click on the telly for Dotty Film Reviews. Be careful not to poke the eye with your cursor or A THING will jump out and EAT YOU.
THE DOTTY HEADBANGER AWARD
This new Dotty Headbanger Award picture was designed by clownonfire for posh people who want a classier looking award picture than the one I created - never mind all the time and effort I expelled doing mine. Click on it to see how to get the award.
THE BRICK & SAUSAGE AWARD
If I was an award, this is the award I would be.
A Dotty Award
An award for We Who Are Mental and for Normals who want to be mental. Take it and keep it for yourself or give it out like other awards - the questions that go with it will appear if you click on our great and beautiful flag.
THE BEST EVER BLOGGING AWARD WITH BINS IN THE PICTURE
I'll never make another nice award. This is it, the only one. LIMITED OFFER - grab it while you can because it won't be here for long.
DOTTY’S COLLECTED COUNTRIES
Why, oh, why doesn't Smurfland like me? SMURFS, you little blue lovelies - come and visit me, please. What have I done to make you snub me like this?
Creepy & Freaky But True
Who keeps taunting me? Who is it? When I catch you I will do this to your head and your arm. I don't know what I'll do with the rest of you but be warned - I have suitcases. Lots of them.
FED UP OF FACEBOOK?
Click the green thing to sign up for Zurker and I'll get some shares.
DOTTY PAVAROTTI, THE SINGING FISH
We shall have a fishy on a little dishy, we shall have a fishy when the boat comes in. Dance to your Daddy, sing to your Mammy, dance to your Daddy when the boat comes in.
KILL ME NOW, I’M AN AWARD SLUT
This award was made by Elaine at elaine4queen. I asked her if I could have it. There's no hope for me, I'll be posting pictures of cute fluffy animals next. Click on it to see more awards made by my talented acolytes.
ANYONE WANT TO ARGUE?
I just appreciate the structural engineering - what's wrong with that?
Really Shitey Shite
Cumberland Sausages I Love You
EAT ME, EAT ME!
